Need to replace the oil tank (for the furnace) because it is to old and the insurance company won't insure us unless we do.
Washing machine went - $800 to fix it!! So we bought a new one.
$$ for logosland, Ottawa trip, wood pellets, brakes. Anyone have a money tree?
So we took D to the trailer with us for 3 days. We saw him and Alex really misses him and so I invited him. I really didn't expect him to say yes, but he did.
Alex and I have been having the best summer ever together. She hasn't been freaking out, and when she does get upset it is minimal compared to how she use to freak out. Now it is over and dealt with quickly.
So D came with us. It was the worse 3 days at the trailer so far!! She had total meltdowns each day. Nothing was right, nothing was good enough. She ripped the strap off her shoe. It was really awful.
I noticed a huge change for the better in her when D moved out, but I honestly thought it was just her getting older. Now I am thinking it is D. Now when I say that I don't mean the D provoked her or did anything wrong. I think she is just stressed or over whelmed and doesn't know how to act.
Alex is very immature socially. When ever she has a friend over she fights with them and ends up freaking out. As much as she is lonely without other kids here, I am starting to think she is better off alone. I mean she seams to have such a hard time with there are extra people around. When it is just her, she is fine.
I don't know what to think anymore.
It was interesting having D with us. He has changed so much. He smokes now. He swore a bunch of times in front of Alex (not to Alex or at her, just in hearing range of her). He has a tattoo on his arm. Huge burn on his chest from a roman candle fight. And for some odd reason he told me he has lost his virginity and has girls sleeping over all the time.
He spent most of the time sleeping at the trailer. He didn't want to do anything with us. Just sleep. It was hard not to mother him. There were many times I wanted to say something but didn't. Like he had cookies for breakfast. He didn't really eat meals, he just eat all the junk food we had and snacks.
I don't know. He said he was happy. I am sad to see what he is becoming. He has plans to go on a road trip this weekend and get drunk. It's like the boy I knew is dead and this one has taken his place.
Anyway, it has been an interesting week.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
thinking
Alex needs a sibling. I wish I had another child. It's too late now. I mean my tubes are tied, but even if they weren't and I got pregnant tonight, Alex would be 8 when the baby was born, so they wouldn't really be playmates.
Plus, well, Mich your son is such a cutie - but I just don't want to have to deal with all that now. Diapers, feedings, sleepless nights, and all the fun stuff that goes with a baby, the a toddler, then a pre-schooler.
Alex needs a playmate. She has a few friends but she fights with them all the time. She is so hard to get along with. I wish she at least had 1 good friend.
Regrets? I don't know. If we didn't foster I probably would have had another child. Really with all we went though with Little D, well a baby would be much more work then that!! But if we didn't foster I wouldn't have been able to stay home for so many years. So fostering meant I got to spend the 1st 5 years of Alex's life with her. But it also meant I wasn't up to having another kid because I had so much on my plate.
Now comes the question of if we want to still do it. Alex really wants us to take in more kids. I do enjoy kids. And I will be honest - the extra cash does help. But the other hand - I am having such a great time with Alex this summer. Just the 2 of us (3 when Troy isn't working). I don't know. Deep thoughts I guess.
But on to lighter things.
I swear that Sherk was modeled after Troy. They are both anti-social. They are both grumps. They both hate other people. They both fart and burp a lot. They both think they are funny. I swear they are the same!!
We went to the trailer and Alex saw that a chipmunk had been eating acorns and dropped the shells on the awning. She said, "look how dirty the awning is. It's because that chipmunk put his dirty nuts all over it!" LOL
And next my thoughts about mosquito's. If they sucked fat instead of blood - think about it!! A weekend camping trip would be free liposuction. Woman would rub mosquito's attractant on instead of repellent. You also have to wonder - why didn't Noah kill the mosquito's when there was only 2?
Deep thoughts. Light thoughts. Lots of thoughts. Too many thoughts.
Plus, well, Mich your son is such a cutie - but I just don't want to have to deal with all that now. Diapers, feedings, sleepless nights, and all the fun stuff that goes with a baby, the a toddler, then a pre-schooler.
Alex needs a playmate. She has a few friends but she fights with them all the time. She is so hard to get along with. I wish she at least had 1 good friend.
Regrets? I don't know. If we didn't foster I probably would have had another child. Really with all we went though with Little D, well a baby would be much more work then that!! But if we didn't foster I wouldn't have been able to stay home for so many years. So fostering meant I got to spend the 1st 5 years of Alex's life with her. But it also meant I wasn't up to having another kid because I had so much on my plate.
Now comes the question of if we want to still do it. Alex really wants us to take in more kids. I do enjoy kids. And I will be honest - the extra cash does help. But the other hand - I am having such a great time with Alex this summer. Just the 2 of us (3 when Troy isn't working). I don't know. Deep thoughts I guess.
But on to lighter things.
I swear that Sherk was modeled after Troy. They are both anti-social. They are both grumps. They both hate other people. They both fart and burp a lot. They both think they are funny. I swear they are the same!!
We went to the trailer and Alex saw that a chipmunk had been eating acorns and dropped the shells on the awning. She said, "look how dirty the awning is. It's because that chipmunk put his dirty nuts all over it!" LOL
And next my thoughts about mosquito's. If they sucked fat instead of blood - think about it!! A weekend camping trip would be free liposuction. Woman would rub mosquito's attractant on instead of repellent. You also have to wonder - why didn't Noah kill the mosquito's when there was only 2?
Deep thoughts. Light thoughts. Lots of thoughts. Too many thoughts.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Been a while
Well school is out and summer vacation is in full swing. In the fall I laughed at some parents because they label all their kids stuff. I get labeling shoes and clothes and backpacks. I just can't imagine spending the time to label every pencil and marker. I mean the labels cost as much as replacing the item!! Makes no sense to me and it is time consuming.
Anyway Alex comes home with all her stuff. In her pencil case is pens, pencils, markers, pencil crayons and whatever else. Everything has a name on it - none of the names is Alex, lol. So all you pencil labelers - it is my kid who steals all your kids school supplies!! Alex said she is queen of the pencils. Whenever a classmate needed a pencil she always gave them one.
I think the reason they needed a pencil is because Alex stole theirs in the 1st place, lol.
So we have a trailer and a seasonal spot at a trailer park. Alex and I have been up there since school let out. No cell service or internet. I am in withdraw!! I mean honestly, how do people survive with out cell or internet?
It has been 2 weeks and we have had 2 snake encounters. Between that and no cell or internet, I am starting to wonder if this was a good idea!?!?
1st snake - Alex went running up to a shed to show me how small it was. She almost stepped on it. I don't know how big it was because I only saw it's tail going into the shed. But it was black and the tail was as thick as a quarter. Alex was so close to stepping on it!
2nd snake was a water snake. Alex said she thinks she saw a water snake. I asked her to show me but she couldn't find it and concluded it must have been a stick. Another mother said she had been coming to the lake for years and never once saw a water snake. So we play and time go by. Then the Mother quickly walks out of the water and says to me there was a snake and it was under the dock.
The snake wasn't afraid of people. It was chasing after the people as they were fleeing from the water. Of course it was all mothers and children there so we are all out of the water screaming and acting like babies. Then a father came along and we asked him scare it away. He hit it with a frisbee. It turned upside down and floated back under the dock. Everyone was sure it was dead and went back to playing in the water.
Not me though. If it was dead then it would have floated out the other side of the dock. It must be alive and wrapped under the dock. The morning turns to afternoon and then to evening. The kids found clams and wanted to crack one open to see inside. They were banging on them on the dock. I guess all the banging was enough for Mr.Water snake because out from the dock he came. Thankfully he just swam away. I watched him as long as I could. He was a fast swimmer!
I hate snakes!!
I lathered Alex and I in sun block yesterday. I reapplied it to Alex several times but only once to myself. My head, face, shoulders, boobs, arms and legs are burnt!! But I would rather be burnt them shoveling snow!! So I am not complaining.
Now I am home for a few days. Stinking work getting in the way of summer vacation!! Work has been hard this summer. They offer me shifts and I do need the money. But every day I work is less time I spend at the trailer!
Alex and I are loving the trailer. This has been an awesome summer so far.
Another plus is I get new glasses soon. These ones are getting to be so beat up. End of the month I get new ones. Hey Mich - you should come with me to pick them out. I can't see and I hate relying on the sales lady to tell me what looks good and not.
What do other people do? I really can't see without my glasses. I have to stick my nose to the mirror to see what they look like and even that isn't clear. I use to wear contacts so I could see what they would look like but I haven't wore them in ages.
Thats all for now folks.
Anyway Alex comes home with all her stuff. In her pencil case is pens, pencils, markers, pencil crayons and whatever else. Everything has a name on it - none of the names is Alex, lol. So all you pencil labelers - it is my kid who steals all your kids school supplies!! Alex said she is queen of the pencils. Whenever a classmate needed a pencil she always gave them one.
I think the reason they needed a pencil is because Alex stole theirs in the 1st place, lol.
So we have a trailer and a seasonal spot at a trailer park. Alex and I have been up there since school let out. No cell service or internet. I am in withdraw!! I mean honestly, how do people survive with out cell or internet?
It has been 2 weeks and we have had 2 snake encounters. Between that and no cell or internet, I am starting to wonder if this was a good idea!?!?
1st snake - Alex went running up to a shed to show me how small it was. She almost stepped on it. I don't know how big it was because I only saw it's tail going into the shed. But it was black and the tail was as thick as a quarter. Alex was so close to stepping on it!
2nd snake was a water snake. Alex said she thinks she saw a water snake. I asked her to show me but she couldn't find it and concluded it must have been a stick. Another mother said she had been coming to the lake for years and never once saw a water snake. So we play and time go by. Then the Mother quickly walks out of the water and says to me there was a snake and it was under the dock.
The snake wasn't afraid of people. It was chasing after the people as they were fleeing from the water. Of course it was all mothers and children there so we are all out of the water screaming and acting like babies. Then a father came along and we asked him scare it away. He hit it with a frisbee. It turned upside down and floated back under the dock. Everyone was sure it was dead and went back to playing in the water.
Not me though. If it was dead then it would have floated out the other side of the dock. It must be alive and wrapped under the dock. The morning turns to afternoon and then to evening. The kids found clams and wanted to crack one open to see inside. They were banging on them on the dock. I guess all the banging was enough for Mr.Water snake because out from the dock he came. Thankfully he just swam away. I watched him as long as I could. He was a fast swimmer!
I hate snakes!!
I lathered Alex and I in sun block yesterday. I reapplied it to Alex several times but only once to myself. My head, face, shoulders, boobs, arms and legs are burnt!! But I would rather be burnt them shoveling snow!! So I am not complaining.
Now I am home for a few days. Stinking work getting in the way of summer vacation!! Work has been hard this summer. They offer me shifts and I do need the money. But every day I work is less time I spend at the trailer!
Alex and I are loving the trailer. This has been an awesome summer so far.
Another plus is I get new glasses soon. These ones are getting to be so beat up. End of the month I get new ones. Hey Mich - you should come with me to pick them out. I can't see and I hate relying on the sales lady to tell me what looks good and not.
What do other people do? I really can't see without my glasses. I have to stick my nose to the mirror to see what they look like and even that isn't clear. I use to wear contacts so I could see what they would look like but I haven't wore them in ages.
Thats all for now folks.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
thoughts
So I bought underwear and a bathing suit. The store policy is bathing suits are non-refundable because of hygiene issues. I get that and I am fine with that. What I don't get is...why is underwear refundable? What non-hygienic things happen in a swim suit that doesn't happen in underwear? That is mind boggling to me.
Any how I bought 'slimming' underwear. Now when I out them on my belly does look slimmer. However I have a huge muffin top because of them. Now my current underwear is size large. I bought XL in these underwear because they looked small.
Now the question is do I want a fatter looking stomach or a muffin top? I think I will stick with my fat belly.
Alexism that I can remember:
Alex - Mom why did you and Dad get married? Oh wait! Let me guess...you were drunk?
Me - There was a year from the time he asked me to the time we got married. So if that was the reason I would have had to have been drunk for a year.
Alex - You were drunk for a year?
Me - No! I married him because I love him!
This one was a while back. She asked if we could take in another kid. A kid around 5 or 6. She needs another kid because she is tried of loosing at checkers to Fat Tony (cat).
Sigh
Oh my camo pants. I was looking for them the other morning. I looked in dryer - there was 3 or 4 things in there - no camo pants. Looked in my basket, Alex's basket, the washer and the clothes line. No pants. So I took everything out of my basket and refolded it. Not in there. Looked in the dryer again - not in there. Took everything out of Alex's basket - not in there. Decided to fold the 3 or 4 things in the dryer and low and behold they were in there. All I could think was "wow these are really good camo pants!"
Troy has finally agreed to let me find a babysitter. I can't find one!! I think I will put an ad at the library looking for one. The problem is a lady I know who babysits will see it and I don't want to hire her. Her kids are wild. Her son beats up Alex and she doesn't do anything because he is mentally disabled. Well if you don't do something now, what's going to happen when he is an adult? I just don't want her. So I am not sure how I address that if it comes up.
I am hoping for a kid at Alex's school. Then in September they can just take the bus home with her and get off here. I have a few calls out. No one has returned them yet. I called yesterday. Not sure how long I should wait for them to call back.
I finally got my stupid garden done. I had it all ready. All I needed to do was drill some holes and nail the boards down. I was waiting for Troy because he was going to do that part. He was just sweeping the garage. I waited and waited and waited. He was making me wait on purpose. So finally I got sick of waiting (I had other things to do) so I just started drilling myself. Well that got him out of the garage pretty darn fast!!
Any how I bought 'slimming' underwear. Now when I out them on my belly does look slimmer. However I have a huge muffin top because of them. Now my current underwear is size large. I bought XL in these underwear because they looked small.
Now the question is do I want a fatter looking stomach or a muffin top? I think I will stick with my fat belly.
Alexism that I can remember:
Alex - Mom why did you and Dad get married? Oh wait! Let me guess...you were drunk?
Me - There was a year from the time he asked me to the time we got married. So if that was the reason I would have had to have been drunk for a year.
Alex - You were drunk for a year?
Me - No! I married him because I love him!
This one was a while back. She asked if we could take in another kid. A kid around 5 or 6. She needs another kid because she is tried of loosing at checkers to Fat Tony (cat).
Sigh
Oh my camo pants. I was looking for them the other morning. I looked in dryer - there was 3 or 4 things in there - no camo pants. Looked in my basket, Alex's basket, the washer and the clothes line. No pants. So I took everything out of my basket and refolded it. Not in there. Looked in the dryer again - not in there. Took everything out of Alex's basket - not in there. Decided to fold the 3 or 4 things in the dryer and low and behold they were in there. All I could think was "wow these are really good camo pants!"
Troy has finally agreed to let me find a babysitter. I can't find one!! I think I will put an ad at the library looking for one. The problem is a lady I know who babysits will see it and I don't want to hire her. Her kids are wild. Her son beats up Alex and she doesn't do anything because he is mentally disabled. Well if you don't do something now, what's going to happen when he is an adult? I just don't want her. So I am not sure how I address that if it comes up.
I am hoping for a kid at Alex's school. Then in September they can just take the bus home with her and get off here. I have a few calls out. No one has returned them yet. I called yesterday. Not sure how long I should wait for them to call back.
I finally got my stupid garden done. I had it all ready. All I needed to do was drill some holes and nail the boards down. I was waiting for Troy because he was going to do that part. He was just sweeping the garage. I waited and waited and waited. He was making me wait on purpose. So finally I got sick of waiting (I had other things to do) so I just started drilling myself. Well that got him out of the garage pretty darn fast!!
Monday, June 14, 2010
stupid gardens!!!
Why oh why did I want to put in gardens!!! Have you ever seen a movie where someone digs up a grave or treasure? Well they are such liers!! It is no where near as easy as they make it look. It is back breaking labour. Even worse when your crappy husbands just sits there and watches you. It is my garden so I have to do the work. Stupid garden.
If I ever decide to put another garden in - shoot me!! Really do it!! It is a lot of hard work. The next house I am buying will already have flower beds in and I am keeping them and that is that!
I am loving the trailer. It is nice to have a place to go. I can't get cellphone there and at 1st I thought it would really bother me (because I am a slave to my phone) but it doesn't. I mean there are times would it would be nice. Like if I could text Troy to bring stuff up or he could do the same. But all in all it's fine.
Work really sucks now. Every time I take a shift that is less time I can spend at the trailer. I want the money but I want to go to the trailer too, lol. I wish Alex was done school so we could spend more time there. I don't know why we didn't do this sooner. Well I do know - no idea how affordable it is!
Alex is in a grade 1/2 class this year. They are learning sex ed. I mean Alex came home and was able to tell me how a baby is made and how it comes out. Grade 1? Isn't that a bit young? She said she learnt it last year - I wasn't aware of that. I mean I have no problem with her learning this. She has books and stuff on it. I just had no idea they teach that stuff so young.
If I ever decide to put another garden in - shoot me!! Really do it!! It is a lot of hard work. The next house I am buying will already have flower beds in and I am keeping them and that is that!
I am loving the trailer. It is nice to have a place to go. I can't get cellphone there and at 1st I thought it would really bother me (because I am a slave to my phone) but it doesn't. I mean there are times would it would be nice. Like if I could text Troy to bring stuff up or he could do the same. But all in all it's fine.
Work really sucks now. Every time I take a shift that is less time I can spend at the trailer. I want the money but I want to go to the trailer too, lol. I wish Alex was done school so we could spend more time there. I don't know why we didn't do this sooner. Well I do know - no idea how affordable it is!
Alex is in a grade 1/2 class this year. They are learning sex ed. I mean Alex came home and was able to tell me how a baby is made and how it comes out. Grade 1? Isn't that a bit young? She said she learnt it last year - I wasn't aware of that. I mean I have no problem with her learning this. She has books and stuff on it. I just had no idea they teach that stuff so young.
Monday, June 7, 2010
I saw this little girl - and she was a cute little girl, but her clothes!! She was dressed just awful. I hate to say it but very dorky looking. I am sure kids at school would make fun of her. My 1st thought was "why would her mother even buy those clothes let alone let her wear them?"
Them I look over at Alex. She has her beautiful pink flower dress on. Her sport socks inside out and pulled up to her knees and her black skull running shoes. I hate it when people make snap judgments about her appearance. They don't know about her clothing issues. There is a reason she dresses like that.
Yet in spite of the fact that I have a kid with issues, and I hate when other people judge Alex's appearance, I did the same thing. You would think that because I live it everyday I would be more in tune with it, yet I'm not. I guess it is something I have to work on.
We set up the trailer this weekend. Alex explored the camp. We found 2 clams with clams inside. Normally I only find empty shells. We put them in a bug box and watched them come out and go back in. It was neat!
Alex played with some of the kids at the park. I really could see how much her social skills are lacking. This one little girl was trying really hard to play with her and Alex wasn't helping at all.
What's your name? - Alex
Do you want to play tag? - No
Do you want to build a castle? - No
How old are you? - 7
At no point did Alex engage in a conversation with her. Just 1 word answers. I know Alex wanted to play with her but she just doesn't have the social skills. We use to roll play. I took her to play group 2x a week for years. I guess we still need to work on it. Even when she did start to play with the other kids (with some help from me) she seamed a lot younger then the other kids - even though they were the same age. Just the way they acted and played.
I am guessing this is because she is an only? Or is it something else? When she went for all that testing aspergers was thrown around. Now I don't think she has that. I do wonder if her lack of social skills is something more then just being an only.
I mean she has had plenty play dates and kids to play with. Is it just her personality? Is it because she is an only? Is it because I failed to install them? I admit it - I am awful at making friends. I can make acquaintances fine. But I have trouble taking that next step. As result I have always had maybe 1 close friend at a time and that is it. This makes me think my lack of skill in that department has rubbed off on her.
Anyway back to the trailer. We got it mostly set up. Troy forgot some tools so he will have to set up the sewage and propane next weekend. It will be just Alex and him at the trailer - should be interesting. It was brought to my attention last night that Troy and Alex have never slept away from home without me before. I always deal with Alex. She always has trouble going to sleep in different places. So it should be a good experience for them. I am interested to hear how the weekend goes.
There was a lot of kids at the park without adults there. I was the only adult. The kids ranged from 2 years old up to 8. I notices a few of the kids came from near by trailers so their parents could watch them from the trailer. But others biked to the park. Is 8 old enough to be off on your own on a bike at a camp ground? I mean it would be so much more convenient is Alex could just go to the park on her own. It is just up the road - however you can't see it from our site. I am just not comfortable with it. Maybe after we have been there a while it will be different. I don't know. I know I am over protective and sometimes it is hard to decide if I am hovering or not. How do you know?
I wish I had some funny Alexisms to add. But I just can't think of any right now.
So that's the report for today. Have a coke and a smile.
Them I look over at Alex. She has her beautiful pink flower dress on. Her sport socks inside out and pulled up to her knees and her black skull running shoes. I hate it when people make snap judgments about her appearance. They don't know about her clothing issues. There is a reason she dresses like that.
Yet in spite of the fact that I have a kid with issues, and I hate when other people judge Alex's appearance, I did the same thing. You would think that because I live it everyday I would be more in tune with it, yet I'm not. I guess it is something I have to work on.
We set up the trailer this weekend. Alex explored the camp. We found 2 clams with clams inside. Normally I only find empty shells. We put them in a bug box and watched them come out and go back in. It was neat!
Alex played with some of the kids at the park. I really could see how much her social skills are lacking. This one little girl was trying really hard to play with her and Alex wasn't helping at all.
What's your name? - Alex
Do you want to play tag? - No
Do you want to build a castle? - No
How old are you? - 7
At no point did Alex engage in a conversation with her. Just 1 word answers. I know Alex wanted to play with her but she just doesn't have the social skills. We use to roll play. I took her to play group 2x a week for years. I guess we still need to work on it. Even when she did start to play with the other kids (with some help from me) she seamed a lot younger then the other kids - even though they were the same age. Just the way they acted and played.
I am guessing this is because she is an only? Or is it something else? When she went for all that testing aspergers was thrown around. Now I don't think she has that. I do wonder if her lack of social skills is something more then just being an only.
I mean she has had plenty play dates and kids to play with. Is it just her personality? Is it because she is an only? Is it because I failed to install them? I admit it - I am awful at making friends. I can make acquaintances fine. But I have trouble taking that next step. As result I have always had maybe 1 close friend at a time and that is it. This makes me think my lack of skill in that department has rubbed off on her.
Anyway back to the trailer. We got it mostly set up. Troy forgot some tools so he will have to set up the sewage and propane next weekend. It will be just Alex and him at the trailer - should be interesting. It was brought to my attention last night that Troy and Alex have never slept away from home without me before. I always deal with Alex. She always has trouble going to sleep in different places. So it should be a good experience for them. I am interested to hear how the weekend goes.
There was a lot of kids at the park without adults there. I was the only adult. The kids ranged from 2 years old up to 8. I notices a few of the kids came from near by trailers so their parents could watch them from the trailer. But others biked to the park. Is 8 old enough to be off on your own on a bike at a camp ground? I mean it would be so much more convenient is Alex could just go to the park on her own. It is just up the road - however you can't see it from our site. I am just not comfortable with it. Maybe after we have been there a while it will be different. I don't know. I know I am over protective and sometimes it is hard to decide if I am hovering or not. How do you know?
I wish I had some funny Alexisms to add. But I just can't think of any right now.
So that's the report for today. Have a coke and a smile.
Friday, June 4, 2010
retraction
I meant to post this earlier - sorry.
It has come to my attention that the troll story isn't true. It is on snopes.com Sorry to mislead you. A co-worker told it to me. I honestly don't know if she knows it isn't true or not. But anyway - so you know that didn't happen.
Thanks
Laurie
It has come to my attention that the troll story isn't true. It is on snopes.com Sorry to mislead you. A co-worker told it to me. I honestly don't know if she knows it isn't true or not. But anyway - so you know that didn't happen.
Thanks
Laurie
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